The Big Picture

At the beginning of each year, I usually have several boring resolutions bouncing around inside my head. Lose weight. Exercise every day. Save money. Make a point to scrapbook on a regular basis. You name the generic resolutions. I can assure you I have tried most of them.

This year, my only resolution is this: Focus on the big picture.

I am a big fan of Peter Walsh, the organizational expert. When he is helping a family, he always asks them to visualize the life they want to live. Then they should make decisions based upon that picture. This works well when organizing a home, but it can also work in daily life. I get reflective as I get accustomed to writing a different year on all of my paperwork each January. So I took some time to visualize my happy place. And then I made a commitment to ensure that my focus will be on that for the upcoming year. I will try to do the things that enhance that picture instead of wasting precious time with the things that can be deterrents. In my big picture, people matter. There is a sparkle in the eyes of my husband and children. Life is fun and peaceful at the same time. We are using the good dishes and wearing the good jewelry and enjoying each day as it comes. My big picture includes peace, love, and sunshine. Patience. Piano lessons, baseball, and a new basketball goal in the yard. It includes making sure all of the people who share their lives with me are glad they do. Time moves slowly, and smiles flash regularly. Stress, chaos, and raised voices are minimal. Small, daily irritations roll right off of my shoulders. Everyone is happy and healthy. That is what I resolve to strive for in 2011. I hope you have a big picture for your family, and I hope this new year is all you ever dreamed it would be!

My Best Christmas Ever

This year marks the first Christmas since I have been a mother in which I had everything ready to go ahead of schedule. Usually, I get up in the dark on Christmas Eve to do Santa duty. While I am up, I wrap some last minute things. I have been known to put together the breakfast casserole, that I intended to make the day before, at this time as well. Last Christmas my house had the stomach flu. A year or two before that, I had bronchitis during Christmas. I remember a Christmas several years ago, before we had any savings, when we had several unexpected expenses just before the holidays. One of them was replacing the transmission in a vehicle. I remember sitting down and mapping out after which payday we could go Christmas shopping as I am generally opposed to credit cards. So we had about 6 days from payday to Christmas to go shopping, find gifts, and get everything wrapped. When it was all over, I felt as though I had been run over by a truck. As a kid I never thought holidays would be stressful, and I don't think they should be now. I have always loved Christmas, but I have not always been able to enjoy it like I hoped to.

With each passing year, I get a little better at planning ahead. I have to tell you, this year I think I nailed it. Everything was bought, wrapped, and assembled well in advance. I had a Ziploc bag in the closet for each of the kids with their stocking goodies ready to go weeks ahead of time. We did the school program. We did the church play. Everyone was blessedly healthy. When Christmas Eve arrived, the girls and I made cookies and cheese ball. Jaron went ice fishing with his dad. There was sledding. At night, we all slept. I got to see most of my favorite people in the world. And take pictures and video of them with my new Christmas gifts;). There were hugs. Video games were played and ringtones were exchanged. I think it was my best Christmas ever. I hope some of the people I shared it with can say the same!

The Tiniest Glimpse

Over the weekend, we paid our first visit to Colton's Steakhouse. It was the first time Megan used a booster seat at a restaurant instead of a high chair. My little family of five colored with crayons as we awaited our steak, shrimp, and chicken, and I kind of felt like it was a big deal. Life with a toddler is not predictable. They do not always cooperate with the best of plans. This particular night, though, Megan sat like a big girl and behaved beautifully. I felt like I was getting the tiniest glimpse into the next phase of our lives. The phase without the diaper bags or sippy cups. I thought it would make me more sad than it did. I thought that when my last baby started to outgrow babyhood I would dwell on that fact. I did not feel that way at all. Instead, I started considering some of the fun things I want to do as a family. Rafting and boating and Chiefs football and water parks. I love rocking Megan to sleep, and right now her head fits perfectly against my shoulder. I will miss that. I'm just saying that during my little glimpse into the future, I liked what I saw.

hunting is for girls

I know there are a lot of girls who do not hunt. I have friends and family who do not mind if deer are hunted, they just don't want to be the ones to pull the trigger or field dress the animal. Well, I don't field dress the animal. Kevin does that for me. When I was in my blind over the past weekend, it was cold and windy. By the time darkness fell I was beyond ready to go home and warm up. But I loved it. I was thinking about all the reasons hunting is for girls, and decided maybe I needed to blog about it.

1. Rest. I use to hunt in a tree stand. I have come to enjoy the blind on the ground these days. You can really get comfortable in there. My gun was sitting on the table. I got to lounge in a bag chair with my feet up. I could see all the ditches surrounding my blind from the windows. Maybe I dozed a little. Nobody needed a single thing from me. For three hours. When is the last time that happened in your house?

2. Reflection. I love to listen and watch as the world goes by. I am not talking about horns honking and people shouting. I am talking about rustling leaves and tall, waving grass and geese in flight. I usually see deer, squirrels, and various birds. Sometimes I see a turkey or fox or coyote. I like to think about the people who may have crossed this field before me. Indians or pioneers who may have gathered around a fire there as their children played barefoot in the grass. I like to consider the way things may have looked then. Without powerlines and blacktops and fences dividing everything into segments. A mind can wander when left alone!

3. Accessories. I remember being out in the yard with my dad and brother once when someone stopped in the driveway for a few minutes. I have no memory of who it was, or what he discussed with my dad, but as he left, he said, "Well, I'll leave you and your boys alone now." My brother and I were wearing dark green coveralls and stocking hats. He thought I was a boy. Until recently, a girl had to look a lot like a boy to hunt, but have you seen hunting clothes for women lately? I got all new camo this year. It comes with pink or purple accents now. Instead of wearing man styles and sizes and looking like I am wearing my husband's pajamas into the woods, I now have Realtree camoflauge head to to, trimmed in pink, that is very obviously made for a girl.

4. The Hunting Bag. I don't know if boys do this, but I always take my hunting bag. I probably should not bring this up after my ramblings about becoming one with nature. However, here are the staples in my hunting bag: deer tags and heritage card, cell phone(set to vibrate, of course), mp3 player(in case nature is being too quiet for too long), hot hands, beverage(hot chocolate is my fave), snacks, lip gloss, extra ammunition, binoculars, extra blanket, digital camera. Pondering the ways of our ancestors does not mean I plan to live exactly as they did or anything. I like my conveniences.

5. The Guy I Married. Hunting always means spending time with my husband. He delivers me to my blind or tree stand and we meet up afterward. We discuss strategy and everything we saw and heard (or texts we may have gotten) during our hunt. Sometimes we hunt together throughout midday. It is something that has always been ours and I look forward to it.

6. Shooting Guns. I like to shoot guns. When I have a gun to my shoulder and my eye on the crosshair, I feel like I am ready for anything. I don't care if I am bringing down a big buck or hitting an orange dot on a paper target. When I fire a gun, and I hit my mark...it feels really good. Everybody should try it at least once.

So maybe you are a great white hunter, or maybe you don't think it is for you. I am just saying it could be your thing. Hunting can be a great thing for girls.

Just Like Me

One of my favorite things about hunting has nothing to do with shooting a deer. When I go deer hunting, Kevin walks me to my blind or tree stand in total darkness before going off to his. I settle in as quietly as I can, close my eyes, and wait for sunrise. Everything is hushed and solemn and serene. Not silent, but hushed. In these moments it is easy to forget about laundry and dishes and trying to build up vacation time at work. There are no worries. There is only peace. And possibilities. And hope. Slowly the woods start to come to life, anticipating the dawn. Squirrels start to scurry from branch to branch. Birds start to chirp and sing. Turkeys gobble. Owls hoot. If you are in the right place, the deer slowly make their way to their feet, shake themselves off, and crunch through the fallen leaves to step out into range. I think most hunters will tell you similar versions of what they would consider to be the perfect hunt. For me, it would go something like this:

On October 30, 2010, Madison went on her very first deer hunt. Hunting is not something that happens spontaneously. Preparation is involved. Kevin is not one to take someone hunting before they are capable and ready, so Madison had practiced with her rifle, an AR 223, and proven herself to be accurate (by accurate I mean repeatedly hitting a target smaller than a baseball from 100 yards). Kevin and Madison worked together in the garage to build a table from plywood and 2X4s, and he asked his grandmother to sew up some denim so he could make sand bags. Now she would be able to have a sturdy place to rest her gun as she shot. Prior to opening morning, we set up the blind complete with the table, sand bags and seating, and everything was all set.

The morning of the hunt, we were all up by 5:30. We delivered the non-hunting kids to Grandma's house. We parked the truck and walked about 500 yards to our blind. We quietly took our seats and settled in to wait. Soon after we could see into the field of clover, a buck deer slowly approached our blind as he grazed. The angle out of our "window" was not exactly right, and we had to move Madison's table and her seat to let her get the best chance at a shot. Leaves rustled during this process, causing the deer to throw his head up and look in our direction more than once. Most deer, with more age and intelligence, would have ran away about three times in the 30 seconds it took us to get Madison adjusted. But he just stood there as Kevin asked, "Do you see him in the scope yet? Do you see him?" She said no a few times until the excited whisper, "Oh, Dad! I can see him!" He said, "You need to shoot him as soon as you are sure!" The words had barely escaped his mouth when she fired her gun. It was the exclamation point to his instruction. In his very next breath, he said, "Oh! Good shot, Madison!" Because that deer fell over like a sack of potatoes. We all but tore the door off of our blind getting out to go see him up close. And then there were pictures and high fives. And hugs. Madison and I are girls, after all. She ran all the way back to the truck at full speed. It was the perfect hunt. Big on antlers and excitement. Small on waiting and waiting to see anything, and small on suffering--for the deer. On my slower walk back to the truck, it became obvious to me that Madison is already irrevocably hooked on two things: hunting and her daddy. Just like me.

10-10-10

To commemorate October 10, 2010, which happens to be my mom's birthday, I thought I would compile a list of the top ten reasons she should be celebrated. TOP 10 REASONS TO CELEBRATE MY MOM ON HER BIRTHDAY

10. Without my mom, my whole family would be nonexistent. I mean the whole tribe. My brother, sister, and I, and all the kiddos involved. That has to make the list.

9. She can break into song in any situation. It's not just that she can, but that she often does.

8. She believes in telling the truth and following the rules. The Golden Rule, and the ones that keep you out of jail.

7. She chose a profession for all the right reasons, and is building her career doing work that she loves.

6. Grandma Judy's house is my kids' favorite place to go.

5. I can tell her anything. No judgments.

4. She made a bucket list. And she crosses things off of it.

3. She loves my dad. A lot.

2. She can say anything...good, bad, or indifferent...in the kindest possible way.

1. She makes the most awesome pancake shapes. Alphabet, smiley faces, butterflies, and tractors.

I don't have to tell you how much I love that!

I know some people do not particularly enjoy the fall. Many people prefer the blooms of spring to the dying leaves that are starting to accumulate, but I love this time of year. I always have, and I always will. I do not mean that I think the fall is kind of cool. I mean I love the fall like I love to hear a baby laugh or smell freshly cut grass or snuggle my squeaky clean children in their pajamas at night. Like I love accessories that coordinate perfectly with outfits or pictures that say a thousand words. It puts a smile on my face to wake up in the morning with a slight chill in the air. I love fall like I love unexpectedly bumping into a beloved friend or finding a pair of expensive jeans in my size for ten bucks.

This season quickly and completely takes me to my happy place. I love opening up the windows and flooding the house with fresh air. The back-to-school routine finds my spirit filled with peace and contentment. The bulletin and white boards are back in use, backpacks are checked daily, and bedtimes are enforced...most of the time. This is the time of year when I feel like everything is as it should be. Summer is such a busy time of year for my family, and when life slows down just a bit for us, I notice. And I enjoy it. I can smell the potential that only comes from new beginnings. New school years and holidays and football seasons. Add that to our favorite team opening their season with an impressive showing on Monday Night Football...and a win! As I said, life is as it should be. Now, I know we are still officially finishing up the summer. I know when fall actually begins because it is Kevin's birthday. But between school and football and this glorious weather, it so already feels like fall right now! And I don't have to tell you how much I love that!