Decision Made

It was never my intention to have more ball teams than children at any given time. I always kind of assumed three kids meant three teams in the summertime. I was also slow to warm up to “travel ball.” I didn’t want my kids to get burned out or injured from too many games, and let’s just say I am well versed on the challenges that can be found within youth sports today. And that is not even mentioning the expense and time commitment involved. But somehow one summer I’m a mom with two kids in recreational ball, and then a short year later I find myself with two kids in recreational ball AND two kids in travel ball. This means I let my son play on two teams. How did this happen?

I had each child signed up for one team apiece, and started to plan my summer accordingly when Jaron got invited to play on a travel team. He really wanted to play. We only knew one kid and one set of parents on this team so I was a little leery to say yes. I mean, we have all seen BAD baseball parents and coaches. Especially on travel teams. The ones whose kids think they are heading to the MLB. The ones who value winning more than everything else and talent more than class. I have always been an advocate for the way sports can teach life lessons and develop character in kids, and I wanted to tell Jaron yes, but I knew I could not handle being part of a team full of egos so big that a baseball dugout could not contain them.

 

I spoke with the head coach and he encouraged me to let him come to a practice. He said we could both take a look at whether or not this would work for the team and our family. He said he would talk things over with Jaron, and my family could make a decision afterwards with no hard feelings either way. Jaron has always been a pretty quiet kid, maybe because his sisters are always trying to talk for him, and he can be very shy in crowds. The fact that he wanted to show up to a practice as the new kid, stepping far out of his comfort zone, spoke volumes about how much he wanted to do this.

When we got there, Jaron walked around some of the boys playing catch to find the head coach, shook his hand, and introduced himself. I stayed in the car for this part. Ladies, here is a difficult truth: There comes a time in a boy’s life when, although he loves you, it is not cool to have Mom hovering around all the time. Your sweet boy, no matter how many times you have rocked him to sleep in the past, will start to think of you most when something is lost or he is hungry, and otherwise will want and need to do a lot of things on his own.

So he practiced with these boys, and within about thirty minutes I could see (from a distance, of course) that he was learning more about base running already than he had learned in the last year of rec ball. I could see the coach stopping him periodically to work on fundamentals, and I knew that if he was interested in joining this team, I was going to have more teams than kids. I am a sucker for anyone taking the time to explain something to my kid, and I could see that this experience could be good for him.

After practice, I met Coach Davis and Jaron handed a paper to me for safekeeping. It was an agreement he had signed in hopes of joining this team. It outlined the team expectations and character qualities he should strive for throughout the season. Decision made.

Here is the thing that most people don’t want to say out loud, Sports Moms.  There are SO MANY bad things going on in youth sports today. It is completely separate post for another time. So when you find a team like this one that values things like attitude, effort, and honesty…you grab ahold of it with both hands and hang on. Even if it means you will have more teams than children. Even if it means more time on the road, less money in the bank, and getting even more behind on everything at home than you already are. Even when you know there is a good chance it will create late nights and cranky mornings.  In a few short years, Jaron will be done playing baseball, but if he cultivates the qualities on this list it will stay with him forever.        

Ode to Stephanie

I  remember when I was a teenager that if I was ever offended or disgruntled by someone, my dad would say, "It takes all kinds, Val." The lesson being that there are many kinds of people in the world, and we might as well learn to accept that and get along the best that we can. How boring would life be if everyone were exactly the same?

Over the years I have met many people, and I have learned that not only are there all kinds of people, but those people behave in all kinds of ways. I have met many people who are kind and compassionate. Loving. I know leaders and I know followers. I have met angry people and selfish people and people who think they know everything. I have seen people who epitomize patience, virtue, strength, and integrity, and those who are in too big of a hurry for me to get to know them at all.

Rarely, in my thirty-six years, I have met a person who is an absolute force of nature. You know this kind of person. They tend to brighten a room when they walk in. They smile at everyone they meet, even on their bad days. They strive to build others up and do the right thing...and they are disappointed when others do not do the same. They are optimistic, thoughtful, professional, and compassionate.  They remember all of your private jokes, and are able to laugh at themselves and enjoy life to the fullest. They take the time to follow your blog and provide feedback. They are fiercely loyal to their spouse, family, friends, and team, and make it a point to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves. When you meet a person like this, take notice. Your life will be better for it.  This is my favorite kind of person, and the world lost one of them well before any of us were ready.