Beyond Basketball

Coach Roberts always said that hindsight is 20/20.  He was speaking of missed opportunities on the basketball court.  Careless ball handling or missed free throws. He must have been right, because looking back on it now, I see many things differently.  He was not easy on us.  Practices were filled with drills and running...lots of sweat, and occasionally sickness.  We did five push ups any time we missed a layup, or shot one incorrectly.  I remember one season that we ran a down and back for every turnover we had in a game.  Probably following the game in which we had 33 turnovers.  He knew how to make a point.  We never had that many turnovers again.  He demanded a lot from us, but it was because he believed we were capable of a lot.  I want to make sure you understand that basketball was more than drills and skills for me.  Back then, I had a page from a magazine on the wall in my room that said, "To play the game is great. To win the game is greater.  To love the game is the greatest."  I loved basketball because it was great, and winning really was greater, but growing up surrounded by my closest friends was the greatest.  I got to grow up playing an awesome game with all my favorite people, supported by all the people in my life that ever mattered.  What could I do but love it?

I think I kind of took Coach and Brenda for granted. I look back now and I see them as a young married couple with small children.  Now I can appreciate how much of their time as a family was shared with us.  I think about how many diaper bags Brenda hauled to our games, and how, instead of resenting her husband's long hours at work, she embraced our team and came along with us. With a baby and a toddler.  In hindsight, I think they had to be exhausted, but I never heard them complain about it.  They did not have to make everything so fun.  Coach was not required to speak with us about avoiding alcohol or avoiding compromising situations with our boyfriends. After some girl drama when we were in junior high, he did not have to shut us in his office with the instructions "I don't care what you say to each other, but don't come out until you work it out and put it behind you!" There were too many extras to name that demonstrated how much they cared about us as people, not just athletes on their team.  In hindsight, those extra hours, lectures, efforts, and tears...those are the things that really mattered.  Those are the extra things that distinguish the great coaches from the good ones.  The great people from the good ones.

These are the things I want my children to take away from sports.  I hope they learn how to play basketball the right way.  I want them to learn things like how to put aside differences and work together with their teammates.  I want them to learn how to set goals, and work really hard to achieve them.  To commit to something, or someone.  I want them to have the confidence to step up when they are needed, and the selflessness to step aside when it is best.  I want them to be people who show up when and where they are supposed to.  People who look out for and help one another.  I look at Madison and her classmates like this:

And in my hindsight I see this:

My hope is that Madison and her friends can share some of the same experiences that we did.  In sports, in school, and in life.  It really goes beyond basketball.